Life without you
by LeatitiaVia
Summary: Harry and Ginny are in love what happens when Harry has to leave to fight Voldemort? Please read, i suck at summeries and this is better than it sounds
1. what i want to say is

Declaimer: I do not under any circumstances own any Harry Potter characters, besides the plot  
  
Life without you  
  
Chapter 1: What I'm trying to say is..  
  
She stared at him from afar. And it wasn't the first time either. How many times did her eyes follow him around the common room or in the corridors as he passed her, or even in the Great Hall at breakfast, lunch and dinner. Not even when she slept could she get those emerald eyes out of her thoughts. Day and night she dreamt of a miracle of some sort where he would go to her and declare his undying love for her  
  
But who was she trying to kid? He, Harry James Potter be in love with her? Virginia Kathryn Weasley? YEA RIGHT! She felt the familiar feeling of disappointment wash over her; as it always did whenever she thought about it. And this definitely was not the fi-  
  
"GINNY" boomed a voice that shook her back to reality. She looked up at the source of disruption. The emerald eyes that hunted her dreams were now looking at her in worry and frustration  
  
"Huh? Harry?" she began, trying to ignore the tingling feeling she could feel in her cheeks  
  
"Yea, Harry. Are you ok Gin?" he asked her, eyeing her curiously  
  
"Yea, yea, I was just thinking about something and got trapped in my own little world" she answered forcing a smile upon her face, as a way of stopping her real thoughts from showing.  
  
"Oh really?" he asked grinning broadly "and what were you thinking about, if I may ask"  
  
"No, you may not ask?" she answered firmly, yet could not suppress a smile of her own. Harry always had that effect on her, ever since she first saw him seven years ago "Although you will probably find out before long" she added, smiling even more at the sight of Harry's some sort hurt look.  
  
"Good" he said smiling again, turning to the brick wall, behind her as if it had just become the most interesting thing in the room.  
  
"So, what did you want?" Ginny asked, to breaking the awkward silence that lingered between them. Ever since her fourth year, she had found a renewed confidence in Harry's presence.  
  
"Oh, just thought I'd come and hang out and talk while Ron and Hermione snog each other's face off, you know the drill" he said with a smirk, shooting a glance in Ginny's direction and was surprised in finding her looking at him  
  
~Oh, shit~ she thought ~oh, shit. I just had to, didn't I? I just had to. Oh God, oh God, I hope he didn't see. Oh God. Oh SHIT!~  
  
"Oh, good" she whispered in a barely audible tone, looking down at the book in her hands, embarrassed  
  
" Yea" Harry mumbled in return " So what do you want to do?" he asked her awkwardly  
  
" I donno.. Wanna go for a walk at the lake?" she suggested shyly, hoping with all her heart that he would accept her offer  
  
"Yea sure.. Just wait a second, will you? I need to get something from my room" he replied, getting to his feet and run towards his dormitories  
  
Ginny stared at his retrieving figure ~ God he's sexy ~ she thought with a sigh, and waited.  
  
~~~ Harry's POV {2 MINS B4} ~~~  
  
"Oh, just thought I'd come and hang out and talk while Ron and Hermione snog each other's face off, you know the drill" he said with a smirk ~and I was also hoping you would go out with me, along with the fact that I love you but I don't know how to tell you~ he added in his mind, and realizing he was staring at her, he looked away blushing. He hoped against hope she didn't notice  
  
"Oh, good" he heard her whisper  
  
"Yea" he managed to mumble back "So what do you want to do?" he asked awkwardly, resisting the urge to tuck a fallen strand of her beautiful her behind her ear  
  
"I donno.. Wanna go for a walk at the lake?" she suggested shyly  
  
Harry's heart skipped a beat. This was the ideal opportunity. The chance he has been waiting for, for two years now. He tried to look her in her eyes, those eyes he loved so much, but she was looking down at her book.  
  
" Yea sure.. Just wait a second will you? I need to get something from my room" he said, getting to his feet and strode to his dorm.  
  
Where was it? He wrote that letter during the summer holidays, over and over again, and he knew it was somewhere there. He shuffled through his trunk, trying to find the letter, which consisted of every single feeling he had toward Ginny.  
  
He was determined to give it to her before he had to go and face Voldemort, which was after his graduation. That was a week away. Time was running out  
  
Ah, there it was. Under his pillow, where he left it the previous night, after reading it for the hundredth time.  
  
~~~^^~~~  
  
As they walked on the grounds, they didn't dare look at each other and only talked about the weather and Quidditch.  
  
~Just do it~ Harry urged himself ~Come on man, just do it~  
  
"Ginny" he blurted out before he could stop himself. The both stopped in their tracks, and turned to face each other. "There's something that I need to tell you" he added soon after, looking in her eyes  
  
"Harry.. What' wrong?" she asked worried  
  
"Nothing serious. Well for me it's serious but you might take it in a tottally different direction" he paused for a second thinking ~oh, God, this is it~  
  
Ginny's head began to spin ~Oh, God, is this what I think it is?~ she thought. "Oh, Harry, what?" She asked him making him stop blabbing on and on.  
  
"Well the thing is... What I'm trying to say is that.. I know that you're.." he tried to begin, not knowing how to  
  
"Harry spill!" she commanded ~come on Harry~  
  
"Well what I'm trying to say" he started again, desperatly trying to ignore the butterfly sensation he felt in his stomach. He began fiddling with his hands nervously. He continued with difficulty, "is that I-"  
  
A/N I am evil ;p r&r if you want to know what happens 


	2. A brother's advice

Declaimer: I still don't own anything  
  
Chapter 2: A brother's advice  
  
"Well, what I'm trying to say" he started again, desperately trying to ignore the butterfly sensation he felt in his stomach. He began fiddling with his hands nervously. He continued with difficulty, "is that I-"  
  
"HARRY!" bellowed a voice from behind them, causing them both to jump. As they both turned they saw Ron striding towards them with an unreadable expression on his face, that caused Harry to stiffen. When he reached them, he looked at both of them in wonder and suspicion.  
  
"Sorry if I'm err- interrupting something" he paused to give them another searching look, before turning to Harry and continuing, "but Dumbledore and Professor McGonagall want to see all seventh years for a graduation rehearsal and briefing"  
  
Harry looked at Ginny torn between wanting to stay and having to go. He wanted to stay to tell her how he felt about her or even give her the letter, but he couldn't bring himself to do it  
  
"Sorry Gin" and he really looked sorry, as he paused and looked at her in the eyes "We'll continue later. It's important. Ok?" and without waiting for an answer he turned to Ron "lead the way, mate"  
  
They span around and sprinted towards the castle, leaving Ginny in her thoughts  
  
"Oh, bugger. Ron you prat!" she said aloud in frustration "he was just about to tell me something important" she added aggravated at her brother, flinging her ands in the air and stomping her feet forcefully to the ground.  
  
~~~^^^~~~  
  
As Harry and Ron reached the big oak doors of the Great Hall, they stopped to catch their breath and Ron turned to face Harry  
  
"Harry, mate, can you forgive me?" he said seriously  
  
"What for, Ron? Harry asked in between sucking large amounts of air. He the looked up at his friend. "Forgive you for what? He repeated, suspicion rising within him  
  
"Well.." he hesitated, gulping "I kindda lied about the meeting" he added in an undertone cautious of the fact that Harry might kill him. And just as he suspected, Harry looked murderous, so he rushed to explain himself "Not entirely. The meeting is still going to take place, just not now. It's in about an hour." He said quickly  
  
"RON!" Harry shouted, "I wanted to tell Ginny something very important" through his eyes Ron could see desperation and anger  
  
"I know" he said softly "that's why I needed to cut in"  
  
"You know?" he asked curiously? "How do you-" he began but he stopped abruptly as realization dawned on him "Hermione" he said simply, running a hand through his hair  
  
"Yep.. Sorry mate" he said with a small smile "But I still don't get why you went to her and neglected to tell me about your situation"  
  
"Well, the fact that you are her brother had something to do with it, along with the fact that Hermione is a girl, and a smart one at that, and I thought that she might find a way to help me" he answered exasperatedly  
  
"True. I have to agree that I don't want to know the details of my sister's personal life, especially when it involves my best friend," he said with a cringe, that made Harry smile," And I most definitely agree that you did the right choice by going to Hermione, as she is the smartest witch alive" he smiled at him  
  
"Thanks, mate, but I still don't understand why you cut in, in my conversation with her" he looked at him quizzically  
  
Ron suddenly went serious  
  
"The thing is, that I don't approve of you doing it as I don't want to see my baby sister hurt" he said in a low tone. Harry looked hurt. He would never do anything to harm Ginny, and Ron knew that. Yet there he was telling him that, that is what he was doing  
  
"Ron I would never-" he began, but was cut off by Ron  
  
"I know you might not want to intentionally but it will happen if you go through with this. Harry, I know that you are planning to face Lord You- Know-Who and lets face it, not even you know what I going to happen. If you don't come back then Ginny will mourn and hurt but she'll get over it, but if you make her love you even more, then she'll be heartbroken and it would kill her. So, please" he looked at his dumbfound friend, in a pleading gaze "please don't do anything until after you come back. Safe and sound, so you can both lead a normal life"  
  
Harry just stared at Ron with a mix of emotions. He wanted to kick him, hug him, or even just walk away. All these emotions were caught in his throat, all at once. He thought of what Ron had just said  
  
"You're right" he said after a few moments of silence. Not even he knew where he found the voice to speak, but as soon as it came out he knew it was true, and so lowered his gaze to stare at his feet. "It would kill her" he whispered more to himself than anyone else.  
  
Ron looked at his friend sadly. He knew that Harry loved his sister but he couldn't have Ginny get hurt.  
  
Then he remembered something else that made him grin  
  
Hermione  
  
"Harry, mate. There is something else that I have to admit" there was something in the tone of his voice that made Harry look up, where he found his best friend with a goofy grin on his face and a glint in his eye  
  
"What mate?" ha asked curious  
  
"I told you to come here for another reason as well" he felt the tips of his ears go red, but he continued "I've been thinking a lot about this and well-" he looked at Harry in hesitation  
  
"Ron, spill" Harry encouraged, feeling his lips curl into a smile  
  
"Imgonnaaskhermionetomarryme" he blurted, feeling his ears turn into the colour of his hair  
  
"WHAT?" he shouted bewildered, "When? How? Well it's about time. You've been going out for two years now and you deserve each other, mate" he added quickly, overjoyed for his friend  
  
"Wow, wow, slow down, mate. I agree, it is about time and that she is perfect for me" he grinned madly and continued "I'm going to ask her tonight, at the Astronomy Tower where we shared our first kiss." Embarrassed he looked at Harry, who was still smiling broadly "do you think I'm crazy?"  
  
"Of course you are, that's why you're my best friend" he joked, but at the lost look on Ron's face he hastily added "just kidding mate. All I can say is yes, you are crazy. Crazy enough in love with her to do it and make it work" he smiled at him. " And if you need any help, I'm here for both of you" he added as an afterthought. He then grabbed him in a brotherly embrace, whispering "Congratulations"  
  
At that moment Hermione appeared at the top of the stairs  
  
"What's going on?" she asked as she edged closer  
  
"Oh nothing. Just practesing for graduation" Harry said through chuckles. Soon both he and Ron were in histerics  
  
"Oh, forget it. I wont even bother" Hermione said raising her hands in silent surrender. A few seconds later she grew impatient "Come on, both of you, we're late", she said to them, grabbing Ron's arm and yeanked it towards the Great Hall.  
  
Ron managed to mouth 'thank you' to Harry before he was dragged away  
  
Harry walked in the Great Hall with a new resolution; not to get too close to Ginny until Voldemort was out of the picture. He would explain everything to her in a letter, after graduation  
  
A/N please tell me what you think of this. R&R 


	3. Harry's Graduation

Declaimer: Nope, still don't own anything  
  
Chapter 3: Harry's graduation  
  
The days leading to graduation were moving very slowly, for Harry, and he had no vivid memories of those days. As he had promised, he stopped meeting Ginny, but his eyes never stopped watching her. This made him love her and long for her even more  
  
The truth was, he hated being so far away from her. He missed her. He missed her eyes, her beautiful hair, her heavenly features, her.. well, everything. He wanted to be with her so badly, but he knew he shouldn't  
  
He tried to avoid her as much as possible. During feasts he would sit with Ron and Hermione away from her, but he would still give her furtive glances. The tricky and most painful thing he managed to do, was to make up silly excuses to leave whenever she came to him.  
  
And she did come to him trying to talk things over, and it pained him to see that confused look she had whenever he would tell her he had something else to do.  
  
Ginny asked herself if she had done something wrong, and that thought haunted her  
  
A few days later she gave up on trying to talk to him. If that is what he wanted, she would give to him. She began ignoring hi, except a few glances she would throw in his direction every so often.. always  
  
~~~^^^~~~  
  
Graduation day finally arrived  
  
All seventh years were restless for the approaching event. Ron was even more nervous as he went over the final details, of his romantic details of tonight's dinner with Hermione, at Harry, who just smiled mildly at his friend while his eyes rested on his friend's sister  
  
As time passed, students left for their dorms to get ready  
  
The Great Hall was decorated in all the houses' colours. The four house tables were replaced by rows of chairs to accompany the graduate's families. Where the teachers' table once was, there were four benches, one higher than the other, where the graduating student would be sitting  
  
Harry sat through the entire ceremony in a daze. He didn't pay any attention to what Dumbledore was saying.  
  
He was thinking of what would follow now, Fighting Voldemort and not knowing if he was going to come out alive or not, leaving Ginny and not knowing if he was going to see her again.  
  
He really needed to tell her, to let her know  
  
As soon as he had received his graduating certificate, Harry left the chaos of the Hall behind him, and headed to Griffindor Tower  
  
As he entered the common room, he looked around knowing that this would be the last time he would be in there of even set his eyes on everything in there.  
  
The place that had become a home for him.  
  
He walked around the room, with his hands stretched out to feel the wood on the tables, where he, Ron and Hermione had spent so many hours studying, the fabric of his favorite armchair where he sat comfortably during the cold winters with Ron and Hermione.  
  
He was sure going to miss this place  
  
He walked to the window, where he saw families celebrating, or leaving to go home and celebrate  
  
He remembered having so many conversations with Ginny, when Ron and Hermione were somewhere 'working', at this very spot -stop it- he told himself -you're leaving, so get on with it-. And with that he withdrew himself from the window and walked towards the common room table, where he took out an envelope with the inscription "GINNY" on it in black messy handwriting.  
  
He looked at it in sadness and brought it to his lips. He kissed it once, slowly, and then placed it on the table.  
  
At that precise moment the portrait hole swung open and Ginny came in. Harry swiftly snatched the envelope and stuffed it in his pocket again, before turning to Ginny  
  
"Ginny?" he asked, "What are you doing here?" he added quickly. -God she is so beautiful right now- he thought  
  
"I could ask you the same thing, Harry" she said coldly "Why did you leave in such a hurry?"  
  
"That's none of your business Gin," he answered "what are you doing here?" he asked curiously  
  
"That is none of your business, Harry" she shot back, through gritted teeth  
  
"Fine" Harry said "You don't ask me and I wont ask you" he told her turning away, tears burning his eyes  
  
"It doesn't work like that and you know it, Harry." He heard her voice tremble "What are you doing here?" she repeated. Fear began to drift in her mend. What is he doing here? Why?  
  
"I'm just looking at this place for the last time, you know?" he replied after a few moments of awkward silence. He tried to sound unemotional, but he knew he failed.  
  
"No, Harry, I don't know!" she said exasperatedly, she tried to walk closer to him, but he walked away from her, avoiding her gaze.  
  
"Harry" she whispered, a silent pleading in her voice was enough to make Harry look up to her "please don't do anything stupid, please. Its not your fault" she begged, trying to reason with him  
  
Harry gave her a small smile. That was another thing he would miss, and had missed about Ginny. She had the ability to pick up on anything, whether you told her about it or not. Well besides a few obvious things.  
  
But something she said shook him. It was his fault. He had to do it. This was What he was made for, but she didn't know. She didn't know the prophecy. It was all up to him.  
  
He strode to her, and grabbed her forcefully be the arms, looking her in the eye  
  
"Don't you see Ginny?" he asked her roughly "It is my fault. Its all my fault. Voldemort is back because of me, I helped him do it. Now I'm going to set things right", in her eyes he could see fear, not for herself but for him. What she saw was pure determination. He looked away, unable to hold her gaze. "I'm sorry, Gin, but I have to go"  
  
He let his hands drop to his sides, and walked passed her. As he reached the portrait hole he heard her shout one last thing to make him stay  
  
"I love you Harry Potter" 


	4. The Long Goodbye

Declaimer: Look at previous chapters  
  
Chapter 4: The long goodbye  
  
"I love you Harry Potter"  
  
The sentence hung in the air for what seemed as an eternity. Harry turned around to find Ginny staring at him intently, with tears sliding down her cheeks and chin.  
  
He stared back at her not believing in what truthfulness she had just let that sentence pass her lips. He strode to her once more, and looked into her eyes  
  
"I love you too, Virginia Weasley" he whispered as he pressed his lips on hers  
  
He tried to pull away, put she held him firmly, pulling him closer. Her tongue demanded entry, as it licked his bottom lip, and he surrendered to her demand within seconds. It felt so right. Electricity passed through both their bodies as they explored each other's mouths.  
  
Neither of them wanted this to end, although Harry kept hearing a very annoying voice in his head telling him to stop, that he had to leave, reminding him of his promise to Ron, his best friend. But he couldn't and soon, he pushed all rational thought to the back of his mind  
  
They headed to Ginny's private prefect room, where she led him to the bed. She pushed hi on the bed and then climbed on top  
  
Harry watched her mesmerized. He knew he shouldn't but he wanted to. Badly. He wanted to feel her close to him, even if this would be the first, last and only time. But he had to ask her. Did she really want this?  
  
"Are you sure you want this Gin?" he asked her in a husky voice  
  
"Yes" she answered in a low, but confident voice, as she began to unbutton his shirt  
  
-At this point, nothing could spoil this moment- Harry thought -not even Voldemort-. And he surrendered himself to Ginny, for the second time  
  
~~~^^^~~~  
  
Ginny woke up the following morning to find that she was alone. Fear drifted into her mind once more, only this time quicker and stronger  
  
She bolted up in bed. On the pillow next to her she found an envelope with her name in black. On the envelope there was a white rose  
  
"Oh, no" she whispered "white roses are for goodbyes" she picked the rose and held it to her nose and smelt it deeply, taking in the fragrance. Tears ran down her cheeks all the way down to her neck as she left the rose and picked up the envelope  
  
She had difficulty in breathing due to a knot that had formed in her throat. As she tore the envelope open, a piece of parchment appeared. She recognized Harry's untidy handwriting as she unfolded it  
  
One hand was held over her mouth to stop her from screaming, while the other held the parchment as she read  
  
Dearest Ginny,  
You have no idea how many times I tried to write to you, about my feeling, about what I had to do, but after last night I knew I had to. The truth is I'm leaving to fight Voldemort. Of course you realized that I would, last night. I should have gone last night, but I couldn't because you bedazzled me with your beauty, that I couldn't leave, I just couldn't resist you.  
  
I want you to know that I do live you. I love you more than anything, with all my heart and soul. I really don't want to hurt with goodbyes so all I can say is 'see you soon', because sooner or later I will see you again, only hopefully sooner rather than later.  
  
I watch you sleep and I cant help but admire how beautiful you are, while at the same time dread fills me as I don't know when I'm going to see you again, and realize that what I have to do now may be easier. Easier because you lit a fire of hope inside me. That hope is to see you again. I love you Gin. I truly, madly, deeply do.  
  
Ginny, I hope you won't waste your life waiting for me to return. You deserve all the happiness you get. I love you.  
  
See you soon,  
  
With all the love in my heart,  
  
Harry XXXX  
  
Ginny had barely finished reading the letter when she collapsed into great, shaking sobs, on her pillow. She could smell his scent on it and cried even harder.  
  
The letter was now covered in big teardrops, but whether hey were hers or Harry's, no one knew 


	5. I'm sorry sis

Declaimer: Dreams don't often come true when things you wish for are someone else's so nope I still don't own anything Chapter 5: I'm sorry sis..  
Ginny emerged from her room a few hours letter, with tears still in her eyes, and was heading to the portrait hole when she spotted Hermione and Ron. As soon as they saw the state she was in, they rushed towards her to see what had happened.  
All Ginny had done was just grab Hermione into a tight hug, but Hermione knew that something was seriously wrong, Ginny was crying so hard that she felt that she was about to cry along  
"Ginny?" she spoke after a few minutes of silence "Ginny, what happened? Is anything wrong?" she cursed herself as soon as the words left her mouth. Of course there was something wrong, she's crying  
"He.. He lef-f-ft.. He's- He's go-o-o-ne" she manage to mutter between sobs. She raised the letter to her friend's eyes and handed it to her. Hermione began reading the letter and with each sentence her eyes would grow larger with sadness and disbelief, She pressed her hand to her mouth, as if not to scream, and tears were forming in her eyes. She hugged her even tighter  
"Oh, Gin, I'm so sorry" and for the second time in her life she was left speechless and she hated the fact that she couldn't comfort her best friend.  
At that moment, Ron, who had been watching the scene and was by now filled with curiosity and began to feel fear of what was going on, so he grabbed the letter and began reading it  
As he read his fear transfigured itself into anger and sorrow. He turned to his crying sister  
"I'M GONNA KILL HIM!" he shouted  
"You are not going to lay a finger on him Ronald" Ginny shouted equally fierce back. The tension between them broke as Hermione stepped between them  
"Ron go wait outside please" she pleaded "Please, just go." He reluctantly obeyed. Shooting another searching look in his sister's direction he left  
As soon as Ron had left, Hermione turned to Ginny  
"What happened Ginny?" she asked softly "the whole story" she added  
"I-I.." she started sobbing again and began taking in large gasps of air, only it seems she couldn't. She tried to suck in breath but she found herself unable to do so and so she started gasping. She clenched her chest and tried to force herself to breathe. She fell to her knees and hands in hope of achieving anything but found it even harder. She just couldn't breath  
"Oh, Ginny" she managed to say as she dropped at her side to understand what was happening. "RON!!!" she shrieked, in the direction of the portrait hole.  
Within a heartbeat, Ron rushed in and at the sight of his baby sister in such a condition, he ran to her, swearing and begging God that she'll be alright.  
They managed to transport her to the hospital wing, but by then she was unconscious and both Ron an Hermione feared for her life ~~~^^^~~~  
She was in a dark corridor now. A dark one. She looked around her. At the end of the corridor she saw a light, and so began walking towards it. As she got closer and closer two figures appeared beside the light. One seemed to be crying while the other tried to comfort them, although there were tears in their eyes as well. It was Ron and Hermione. When Hermione saw her, she strode to her and wrapped her arms around her  
"Oh, Ginny I'm so sorry" she sobbed  
Ginny didn't have time to answer as Ron hugged her and slowly pulled her away. The next moment she was alone. Alone with the light. She walked closer. She was so close that she was almost there. She was through, but she couldn't focus her eyes on anything because of the strange bright light. When her eyes began focusing a horrible sight met her ~~~^^^~~~  
"HARRY!!" Ginny screamed bolting up in her bed, "Harry" she shouted again, only less loud. Hermione and Ron jumped at her screaming but Hermione was the first to recover and was now by her side hugging her  
"Harry" she repeated in a barely audible whisper, tears forming in her eyes again "He's.. He's gone" she said numbly, her eyes transfixed on the opposite wall  
"Shhhh" Hermione whispered in her ear, caressing her hair and rocked her to and fro; like a mother who rocks her crying child.  
"Hermione?" she asked as if realizing for the first time where she was. "I've lost him.. I love him, but I've lost him for ever, and it hurts" she couldn't take it any more and burst into tears on Hermione's shoulder  
Madam Pomfrey had just walked in holding what looked like water  
"Dear girl" she eyed her with sadness "you have been through so much. Here drink this." She handed her a glass of the water-like liquid "you wont be having nightmares when you go to sleep soon" she added  
Ginny thanked her and was about to drink it when a white owl flew on her lap  
"Hedwig?" Ron asked, breaking the silence for the first time Hedwig stretched her leg to reveal a letter that she had for her. With trembling hands, Ginny unwrapped the letter and began reading it. A small gasp escaped her lips. It was form Harry  
  
Dearest Ginny,  
By now you should have found my first letter and I want to apologize for leaving like that. I know you might never forgive me, but I did it for both of us. It would have been twice or even thrice as hard to do it in person. I want you to know something Gin.. I love you. I really do and I want you to know that whatever happens I'm always going to be there for you. You might be thinking of following me, that is why I wont tell you where I am. There are a minimum of people that know where I am. It is to dangerous otherwise. I really have to be on my way now, so for now, goodbye and see you soon, Ginny, my love  
  
With all my love  
Harry  
  
P.S: Can you please take care of Hedwig until I come back? Because I plan to   
Although she was still crying, Ginny didn't collapse into heavy sobs again. Instead she folded the latter up and handing it to Hedwig, whispering to her not to allow anyone to read it. Before anyone could ask questions, she drank the dreamless potion and slept. She wanted to sleep away the pain, the sorrow, the fear, everything. She lay on her pillow with small tears still prickling down her cheeks.  
Ron looked at her and went to sit beside her; his hand stroking her red hair, just like he had done when they were younger and she would come crying after she had a bad dream. He hated seeing his baby sister like this and he blamed himself for it. He should have never let her get too close to Harry. It was his fault his sister was like this. Tears were now forming in his own eyes at every thought that occurred to him. He leaned to kiss his little sister's forehead and sat up in his chair looking at her. His hands were clenched at the arms of the chair, his tears falling freely.  
Hermione went over to Ron and sat on his lap, leaning her head on his shoulder, while her hands folded him in a hug. He just sat there. Frozen and unable to do anything, but look at his sister. Unable to feel anything but guilt for bringing this upon her. Unable to feel anything but hatred towards his best friend for leaving her like this. And he cried  
  
A/N: please review coz otherwise I'm thinking of dropping this story with the amount of reviews I'm getting.. But to those who did review my past chapters thank you very much 


	6. Red Rubies

Declaimer: Look at the other chapters

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****

Chapter 6: Red Rubies

Ginny and Ron arrived at the Burrow three days later, and although the Weasleys found out what happened, they did not know the entire story and Ginny was thankful to find out that they didn't pressure them for details. They knew that she would tell them when she was ready, but at the moment she just wanted to be alone. She went straight to her room, leaving her trunk downstairs.

The days that followed were grim in the Weasley house. Due to the fact that they were worried about their sister, George and Fred moved back in, while Percy finally made an appearance or two to check up on her.

But Ginny was hardly ever seen through the summer holidays

One day, about two weeks before her return to Hogwarts, she came downstairs. All Weasley members (except Arthur, Molly, Bill and Percy) looked to her in concern and surprise. AS she descended down the stairs, a strange smile formed n her lips, which made her brothers very uneasy.

"Ginny!" Ron exclaimed "Are you ok? Are you hungry?" he asked, his voice uneven with anxiety

She looked at him, her smile slightly vanishing. 

"No, no thanks, Ron" her voice was different. No longer vibrant and awake, but silent, barely a whisper and depressed. It sent shivers down his spine. She then turned to her other brothers, after piercing him with her cold eyes.

"I'm going for a walk at the lake" she said. It wasn't a question, it was a statement and without waiting for a reply she walked out the door 

The boys looked after her with surprise, in her change of character and mood

"She isn't ok" Ron stated, echoing everyone's thoughts. He turned to the others, "Is she?"

"Far from it I'm afraid" Charlie said slowly, still looking at the door. He looked at Ron, his eyes reflecting the tone in his voice; fear

"She probably want some time alone" George said unconvincingly

"Right?" Fred asked unsure and worried, looking from Charlie to Ron, waiting but not fully wanting the answer

Silence filled the kitchen. Not a good silence, but a bad one. A very bad one. The air was drained and the atmosphere was tense. The boys looked at each other but said nothing

Finally Ron broke the silence, in barely a whisper

"I'm going after her" his voice had driven the others back to the present situation, and away from the black thoughts that were going through their minds

Before anyone could react, he was out the door as well, following Ginny's footsteps. The others, apprehensive of what to do, stayed where they were

~~^^~~

Ginny arrived at the lake in less than ten minutes. She slowly sat at the end of the small wooden pier. She used to come here when she needed to think or be alone. She smiled at the memory. This was her haven, her sanctuary.

The first thing that attracted her here were the colours. The lake's colour was a very deep shade of blue that even the ocean didn't look this vibrant. In some places the water would go deep and navy blue while in other places it would go light green because of he shallowness of the lake. Although the lake was more than four meters deep, she could see the bottom clearly

The surface was mostly covered in small leaves. These leaves belonged to the surrounding trees, that went around the lake. Ginny looked at the trees, and gave a small smile again as she remembered Harry's eyes and how they would fit perfectly with this scenery. She thought that the colour of the tees should actually be that emerald colour that she loved, because this shade did not do the scenery any justice 

'We'll be together soon' she thought as she got up weakly. She conjured a piece of parchment and a quill from the air

She held the quill to her mouth as if thinking of what to write. All she managed to write in the end was:

_Dearest family,_

I love you deeply but I'm sorry. I had to, it just hurts too much. I'm sorry. Goodbye 

Ginny XxX

P.S. Ron, congratulations on your engagement. I'm really happy for you

She then conjured an envelope from the air again, placing the parchment and setting it on the floor beside her.

For the third and last time she conjured something else. This time it wasn't parchment, or a quill or even an envelope. It was a dagger.

The dagger was small, with a gold handle, which was decorated in with a single red ruby, while the blade was silver and extremely sharp. It was a family heirloom that she 'borrowed' without asking

She held it to her eyes, with her left and, to have a closer look. The ruby shined in the sun so beautifully 

She lowered the dagger to her right wrist and pressed it to her soft skin, biting her lips to suppress a scream

The blood glimmered in the sunshine. She smiled at the similarity of the blood with the ruby. Her smile was not due to that but also to the fact that, when the blade had cut trough her skin, she felt the pain that was settled upon her heart leave and made it almost pleasurable for her. This encouraged her to proceed.

She handed the dagger to her other hand, although it was becoming very weak, and struck her unharmed wrist, a bit more fiercely than the previous time. This time she let out a small scream

She spread her hands out to her sides and raised her head to the sky, her tears escaping her eyes.

The blackness was consuming her, she could feel it. Her head was spinning and she was losing her balance. Her knees shook as they gave way and she fell. Everything around her was suddenly cold, and her body grew numb.

She allowed the darkness to devour her as she shut down her senses and knew no more

A/N so? What do you think? Please review and tell me what you think


	7. The Twin's Plan

Declaimer: look at the other chapters

I would like to send my thanks to everyone that reviewed my story but specially to

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VarsityCheerleader: thanks for reviewing all my stories, I hope these two chappies reach your expectations. Btw I loved your story _Ginny and the Cheerleading squad,_ keep up the good work

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Mep1: you are absolutely right, I will continue whether I get reviews or not thx for the encouragement 

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Ahbahh: thank you for your kind words but you should go ahead and write your story. I cant say anything else you are going to have to stay tuned to see 

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Chapter 7:The Twins' Plan

Ron kicked the front door open with all his might, panting hard and out of breath.

The reason of why he kicked the door open was that in his arms lay Ginny, along with a piece of parchment that was partly covered in blood. He looked terrible. His eyes were bloodshot as he tried to suppress the pain he felt from forming tears. The pain he felt though was not physical pain he felt that led his tears to form but the emotional pain that was about to break his heart

The twins both jumped up from the shock, but recovered quickly at the sight of their unconscious sister and ran to help Ron. Charlie was so surprised that he couldn't move, except to press himself against the wall to allow them to pass, and settle Ginny on the couch

The three brothers noticed heavy blooded bandages on either of her wrists. The twins looked at Ron in horror while Charlie disapparated.

"What happened Ron?" George asked anxiously looking at him, but shooting furtive glances at Ginny. Ron didn't answer, he was looking at Ginny with mixed expression of worry and terror. George walked a little closer to him

"Ron" he repeated "what happened?" he finished slowly as he saw the state in which his brother, was in for the first time. 

He was drenched in water and beside the occasional shiver he seemed oblivious to that fact and continued to stare at Ginny. He then seemed to come to his senses as he ran a hand through his hair and looked away

"She.. She cut her wrists" he said finally, his voice trembling "she cut her wrists and fell in the lake" his voice was now breaking down, as he took small confused steps around the couch still, ruffling his hair. He stopped and turned to George 

"I-I.. I saw her fall" he said faintly. George was taken aback by the amount of pain he saw in his brother's eyes and turned away not being able to take it in. "I ran as fast as I could, but she fell" he repeated, in shock sinking into a chair. His eyes were burning.

"I jumped in and dragged her out." He looked at his brothers in distress as he remembered what happened. "The water was full of blood.. It was full of blood". Tears were now escaping his eyes and he rubbed them. He couldn't talk anymore. He couldn't.

His brothers were dumbfound by the amount of emotion that Ron was expressing. Fred walked to him and put an arm around him, allowing him to break down o his shoulder if he felt he needed it

"You did alright, bro" he whispered comfortingly. "You did alright" he repeated, rubbing Ron's shoulder.

Ron turned to face his brother, his tears falling freely, as he didn't bother to deal with them. He whispered "full of blood" before burying his head in his brother's shoulder

A loud '**_pang_**' was heard, that made Ron, Fred and George jump in surprise. Charlie had just apparated with two medi-wizards, who took one look at Ginny and rushed right over to her

They removed the small bandages from her wrists, applied a thick green substance, then they took fresh bandages out and re-bandaged her wrists. Soon after their job was done they got up from Ginny's side and walked to Charlie, and handed him a bottle of transparent liquid

"When she wakes up she'll be a bit shook up and have some trouble sleeping. If she wakes up with nightmares, give her a glass of this to drink. It will help her relax and go into a dreamless sleep" he said. He then gave him a small container of the green substance that he applied on her wrists earlier

"And change her bandages every five days" he added slowly and catching the anxiety in Charlie's eyes he gave him a comforting smile "Don't worry. She'll be alright. Right now she's in a state of shock and she just needs her family to be there for her"

The second medi-wizard spotted Ron, who was tear stained and slightly shaking with cold

"Are you going to be ok, son?" he asked politely as he walked towards him. Ron nodded, bowing his head

"I'm just a bit cold" he mumbled, still shivering

The medi-wizard rummaged through his first aid bag and took out a small packet of purple pills. He cut out four and handed them to Ron

"Have these; one every four hours" the medi-wizard told him, as Ron took them. "Just in case you get a cold" he added

"Thanks" he whispered solemnly and with another '**_pang_**' the medi-wizards disapparated

"I'm going to find mum and dad" Charlie said after a few moments of awkward silence and disapparated again

Silence filled the room once more. None of them spoke. They just looked everywhere trying to settle their eyes anywhere but on Ginny, except Ron who couldn't take his eyes of her. The twins tried to avoid his eyes so they wouldn't have to see the loss in him. Until he broke the silence

"I'm gonna go sleep" he mouthed, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. "Wake me up when in four hours so I can take the next pill" he said quietly as he swallowed one of the purple pills in his hand. 

He began making his way to the staircase. He stopped at George's voice 

"Do you want a glass of this?" he asked. When Ron turned to face him, he saw that he was pointing at the dreamless sleep potion. He thought about it and then nodded 

"Yea sure. But just a bit" he said, looking at his brother "Ginny needs it" he added gravely

"Yea, but you've been through a lot as well bro.. You deserve it" Fred said as George handed Ron a glass of the potion

Ron mumbled his thanks and turned to walk up the stairs to his room

"Poor guy" George told his twin as Ron disappeared up the stairs

"I wish there was something we could do for them. Both of them" Fred agreed

"Maybe they just need time" George suggested gloomily. He then spotted the bloody letter that Ginny wrote and Ron dropped as he carried her inside

He picked it up

"Hey, what's this?" he held it up to read it out loud

"_Dearest family, I love you deeply but I had too. It just hurts too much, I'm sorry. Ginny"_ he read, his voice trailed off as he looked at his twin who was dumbfound. He then glanced back at the letter. 

"Oh, wait. There's a P.S. Ron congratulations on your engagement. I'm really happy for you"

It was now his turn to be dumbfound. He stared at the word engagement with his mouth slightly open. His brother gaped at him, stood up and strode to him and snatched the letter from him and read it himself.

"Engagement?" he almost shouted bewildered "Ron's engaged? With who?" he asked stupidly. His brother whacked him over the head. "Oh, yea, Hermione" he said, rubbing his sore head

"Hey, maybe that's what we could do" George said, with a sparkle in his eye "Invite Mione. Then Ron will have her to comfort him, and maybe even cheer him up a bit and take his mind off everything. And Ginny will have a woman around to hang around with and talk to" he finished turning to his brother, who smiled at the idea

"Brilliant idea, if I may say so" Fred said

"Of course you may" George smirked. "Do we owl her or do we apparate to her flat?" he asked

"Well, one should apparate and the other should stay here to watch over Ginny and Ron" Fred answered thoughtfully. George looked at him 

"Thanks for offering, bro" he said clapping him on the back and disapparated before he could answer

~~~~~

A while after, Hermione was at the Burrow, sitting in the kitchen drinking tea with the twins. The twins were filling Hermione in with the latest happenings of the Burrow, including Ginny's attempted suicide and her letter

By the time the letter was mentioned, Hermione was worried and anxious, not only for Ginny but for Ron as well. When the letter came up, Hermione felt slightly embarrassed

"Why didn't you tell us? Either of you!" George demanded in mock outrage

"Well-" she began "I guess Ron was waiting for the right moment, and we kinda put it on hold, as we were too involved with the war and every thing that has been going on with-" she stopped, her voice trembling. George placed a comforting hand over hers, indicating her that she didn't have to continue, but she did. "with Harry"

The twins grew solemn. They both knew how close the three of them were and they would prefer that Harry were there with them. To celebrate with them, as best man

Now everything was changed. They knew that. Harry was gone now, Ron was depressed, Ginny was suicidal, and there was no sign of Harry coming back, let alone anytime soon

"Yea.. Sorry about that Mione I-" Fred began but was cut short by movement from the couch 

Ginny was moving. They rushed over to her

A/N you know the drill (only this time go through with it)


	8. The Vision

Declaimer: I own everything!!!!! * throws hands in air and falls to knees. Looks around menacingly and sees people staring at her. Gets up and cleans dust from clothes* hem yea, and did I mention I'm the queen of England. Pfff * walks away and hits a wall as she turns*

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Chapter 8: The Vision

He stood here looking at her with an expression of disbelief. In shock he called out her name as he strode toward her. As she saw him approach, she froze. Could it really be true?

"Ginny?" he asked with amazement, looking at her. "Is it really you?" and without waiting for a reply he took her in her arms. "I cant believe this actually worked" he whispered in her hair

He held on to her as if never wanting to let go, but before long he did. He examined her with his eyes before he spoke again in an urgent tone

"Listen, Gin. It's dangerous out here. I already know what you tried to do and I want you to promise that you will NEVER try to do anything like that, ever again. Please! Look after yourself

I will come back ; soon the Dark Lord shall be defeated and only time will be able to keep us apart. And whatever happens DO NOT try to follow or look for me! You hear? Don't! 

Your family needs you there. I need you there. To know that you're safe, and I cant think of anywhere safer for you, besides Hogwarts. Smile. Everything will turn out fine and in the end we'll be together again" he looked at her , his eyes boring into hers. 

He bent and brushed his lips against hers.

"I love you Virginia Weasley. For now and all time" he whispered. There was a blinding green light and he was gone

She was alone, surrounded in darkness

"I love you Harry Potter. For now and all time" she whispered shutting her eyes which were already burning with unshed tears

~~~^^^~~~

When re-opened her eyes she could see three blurry figures staring at her from above. Two of which had red hair

_Strange_ she thought

A/N soooooo? What you think? R&R plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz 


	9. Harry told me

Declaimer: How many times do I have to tell you people that I do not own _anything_? If you want to believe that I am the mastermind of this holy book then go ahead and do so I most certainly wont stop you (really I wont) *looks around pleadingly and notices others staring blankly*. Fine be like that *turns around and carefully avoids wall but slams into door* 

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Chapter 9: Harry told me

Ginny opened her eyes and blinked several times at the sudden light and tried to regain focus of her surroundings. When she had succeeding in doing so she noticed that the three figures illuminating above her were in fact Fred, George and Hermione. They all looked very worried and let out sighs of relief as they saw her wake up

She began to wonder what had happened when it all came flooding back, including her vision. _Had it been real_ she pondered. She didn't have time to find an answer as she was bombarded by the same question by all of them

"Ginny, are you alright?" 

"Well" she began but she faltered; she didn't know how to answer.

Her heart was broken in a million pieces, she felt her head pang with a headache the size of Jupiter, her wrists hurt like hell and she felt like she was shaking all over. But she didn't have enough strength to go through all of that 

"Been better" she managed to mutter as she tried to sit up

Fred saw her action and held her down "Oh no you don't. You should lie down Gin. Doctor's orders. And you need your rest" he told her, his voice overflowed with weariness, "Do you want some tea?" he asked her softly

"Err.. sure" she mumbled miserably. Merlin her head hurt

When she had received her tea she was allowed by Fred to sit up and drink it. Fred, George and Hermione sat around her and waited intently for her response

"What?!?" she asked frustrated after a while

"What do you mean 'what' Gin? Are you gonna tell us what happened out there and why?" Hermione asked her, her voice full with concern

"I.. I.. I' m not really ready to talk about it yet" she replied in a whisper. Hermione placed her hand over Ginny's and smiled at her with understanding and reassurance 

"Whenever you're ready, Gin" she told her "We're all here for you" 

_Yea, all except Harry _she thought bitterly. "Who.. who pulled me-" she began without being able to complete the sentence. Nevertheless they all understood what she was asking

"Ron" George replied gravely, looking down at his intertwined hands. He did this when he was nervous and in loss of words. "He was a real wreck when he came back Gin" he looked at her "He's a real wreck." Ginny looked down at the tea in her hands

"I'm gonna go see how he is" she said a few moments later

She tried to stand up but she was still shaking. George and Fred helped her steady herself against Hermione

"I'll come with you. I need to see him" she told Ginny as they headed upstairs 

When they reached Ron's room, they pushed the door open and walked in. The floor was covered in unidentifiable objects as they appeared to have been shattered against the wall

As they made their way towards the bed they noticed that the covers were thrown everywhere in every angle except over Ron's body. Ron lay with his legs spread out, with one hand dangling over the end of the bed while the other rested over his face, as if he had been crying silently as he drifted to sleep. He was wearing only boxers

Even though he was asleep they both saw that George was right; Ron really was a wreck

When they reached the bed, Hermione leaned over and held Ron's hand and kissed it softly. She whispered his name. He lifted his arm from his face and looked at Hermione through half closed eyes

"Mmm" he mumbled, "Hi, babe" he tried to smile. Hermione leaned over and gave him a quick kiss on the lips

"Hey" she whispered, "You have a visitor" she added, getting up still holding his hand, while bringing Ginny into view. As soon as he laid her eyes on her, he shot out of bed and strode to her capturing her in a bear hug

"Gin, are you ok?" he asked through her hair

"Yea, thanks to you" she replied weakly, her voice hid hints of both relief and disappointment. Ron drew away from the hug but kept his hands on her shoulders, his eyes boring into hers

"Why Gin?" he asked softly. He wanted, he needed to know. "Why did you do it?" Ginny closed her eyes and looked down at her feet

A few moments passed until she finally looked back up, straight at him

"I wanted to do it. I don't know what got into me" she answered truthfully without blinking. "This morning I had this dream. It took me out of this world. I wanted to reached that world and the only way to do so was to.." she let her voice trail off. Ron hugged again, tighter

"I'm so sorry Gin" he managed to say

"There's no reason to be sorry Ron" she answered weakly. "Voldemort is going to be defeated soon, very soon in fact, and Harry will come back".

For a second time, Ron pulled away from his sister and surveyed her closely

"What?" he asked surprised "How do you know?"

"He told me" she replied simply

"Who told you?" he asked again, his voice was beginning to crack with worry

"Harry, Ron" she answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Harry told me. I saw him. And he told me not to worry and that everything will be fine. He's going to defeat him soon" she said, with a fresh image of Harry in her mind

Ron looked at his sister quizzically. He then looked at Hermione who spoke for the first time, more to break the awkward silence than anything else

"Ron, I'm going to take Ginny to her room so she can get some rest. I'll be right back" she said while edging towards Ginny, taking her hand and leading her outside without a backward glance at Ron

Neither said anything on the way to Ginny's room, but as they entered the room, Ginny turned to Hermione

"You believe me don't you?" she asked, tears threatening to escape her

"Honestly Gin I don't know what to believe. You're in a state of shock and you could have easily imagined it, like a hallucination. At the moment nothing is sure" she answered honestly. "I forgot your potion. I'll be right back" she added exiting the room leaving Ginny alone with her thoughts

She looked around her room blankly. _It couldn't have been a hallucination. Would it? _ She thought, _ No! it was definitely real. Voldemort will die soon and Harry will come back to me._

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps, as Hermione ran up to Ginny's room. Soon her door opened and Hermione came in holding a glass of the watery-like liquid that Ron had earlier on

"Your parents are downstairs" she whispered urgently, "but I told them not to come up and bombard you with questions and let you rest" she looked at her. "They're really worried you know"

Ginny just looked around her room, avoiding Hermione's piercing gaze and moved to her bed, where she sat. Hermione followed, sitting down next to her and rested her hand on Ginny's

"Why?" she asked softly, her eyes never leaving her face

"Mione, I'm really tired. Do you mind if we talk about this another time?" she asked pleadingly, her eyes transfixed on the opposite wall

"Yea, sure" she replied softly, "whenever you feel ready. We're all here for you Gin. Don't forget that ok?" he told her while leaning to hug her

"I know" she whispered back. "I know" she repeated more firmly, whilst she hugged her back.

She was grateful to have such an understanding and patient friend as her, she thought, as silent tears ran down her cheeks

Needless to say, Ginny didn't sleep that night

A/N so? Whaddya think? Good? Bad? Reaches your expectations? R&R 


	10. Back to Hogwarts

Declaimer: I assure you nothing has changed since I have last written and I do realize that, that was quite some time ago and I apologize. I wanted to update at least a chapter in each of my stories by the end of the year and I hope you enjoy them  
  
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Back to Hogwarts  
  
A day before school began, Ginny had gone to Diagon Alley with Hermione so they could get Ginny's last year supplies. Ginny had spent most of her time trying to mingle with her family as much as she could after the incident by the lake. She feared that she wouldn't be out of time to do so before she graduated that year and she had plans of her own when she actually did graduate, so she tried to make the most of it.  
  
At Diagon Alley, the majority of wizards and witches seemed to be out to celebrate the official fall of Voldemort. True to Ginny's dream, Voldemort was defeated three days later. This earned her bewildered looks from Hermione and Ron, but neither mentioned anything to which she was grateful.  
  
Today she was going to spend her time with Hermione, her future sister-in-law, her confineder and best friend.  
  
When they had finished their shopping they decided to sit down and relax with a butterbeer. There was an old newspaper laying on the table they chose. Hermione picked it up and read the headline on the front page  
  
"He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is gone, along with Hero's body" her voiced trailed off and looked at Ginny. "I'm sorry Gin" she added softly  
  
Ginny gave her a weak smile and shrugged  
  
"He's not gone you know" she whispered, looking at her hands that were located on the table. "But I don't understand why he wont come back to us?" she asked exasperatedly. She didn't cry. Actually she had stopped crying along time ago  
  
She realized that her pain could not be expressed through tears so she gave up all together. Hermione wished she would cry because she would be able to deal with tears rather than unspoken pain but it didn't stop her trying  
  
"Ginny, why did you try to erm.. kill yourself?" Hermione asked cautiously, eyeing her with concern  
  
Ginny looked up at her, her eyes boring into hers. Looking into her eyes, Hermione felt some of Ginny's pain and she immediately regretted ever mentioning it  
  
"What would you do Mione?" she asked steadily, "If Ron left you the same night you gave yourself to him, without the slightest idea of ever seeing him again? And especially when everyone thinks he'll turn up dead?"  
  
Whatever Hermione expected, it wasn't this. She was momentarily taken aback and she found herself thinking of what she would do if that actually did happen to her and she did lose Ron. She would be lost, worst, she would probably die  
  
She looked back at Ginny, her expression softened and changed to one of deep understanding  
  
"Exactly" Ginny said, looking back at her hands  
  
Nothing much was said after that and they soon made their way back to the Burrow where she went straight to her room. She would be awoken within a few hours to go back to her final year and complete her education to become a fully qualified witch, in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.  
  
But becoming a fully qualified witch was not the only reason Ginny wanted to graduate that year. She had other plans for after Hogwarts  
  
When Ginny boarded the Hogwarts Express she decided to get a compartment to herself. Though she wanted to be around people; to interact, to talk, to stop her mind from wandering, she knew that she needed to through, things of her past, her present and make plans for the future  
  
Here in this compartment, she would try to do so  
  
She looked out of the window and allowed herself to ponder pass doings and things that should have been done. Her mind drifted to Harry, like it usually does.  
  
She missed him, that much was true, but she would try her hardest to get over it, as obviously he had done. Not here though, as everywhere she went, looked there was a sign of him and it would be so hard. Not she would have to leave.  
  
Tears flooded her brown eyes and slowly made their way down her cheeks. She quickly wiped them away as the compartment door slid open and Luna Lovegood appeared. She walked towards Ginny and gave her a tight and warming hug  
  
"I'm so sorry Gin" she said rubbing her back fondly. "I know how much he meant to you" she added looking at her and gave her an encouraging smile, to which Ginny gave a small smile of appreciation  
  
"Thank you Luna" she replied softly. Luna got up and walked to the door, but before she walked out she turned to Ginny one last time  
  
"You know Ginny, I'm right here for you if ever you need anyone to talk to" she told her sincerely. "About anything" she completed as an afterthought and disappeared, leaving Ginny to her thoughts.  
  
Ginny merely sat there looking at the spot in front of her that was occupied by Luna only few seconds ago, with a new understanding growing towards her. She sighed and looked back out of the window once more  
  
As the Express began to slow down she started to changed into her school robes and when she got off the train she found Luna waiting for her as if out of an unspoken agreement. Together in their silence they made their way to the castle  
  
And so they moved through the year.  
  
Luna was the only person Ginny would or even could react to. The other girls of her year felt sorry for her and they would try their best not to bother her. They would stop speaking when she would walk into a room, give her pity looks and what was thought to be encouraging smiles. Ginny hated it. She didn't want to be pitied and so she spent her time with someone that understood her. Luna. When she wasn't around Luna, Ginny would bury herself in studying to keep her mind off everything.  
  
As time passed, Ginny grew less lonely and she slowly got out of her trance and visited Hogsmade a few times. They talked about the weather, school, the world. None of the topics ever reached Harry. It was still painful for Ginny and Luna respected her choice  
  
Soon Ginny's and Luna's graduation was in three days away; and they were both eager to leave and begin their own life  
  
On the evening of their graduation Ginny dressed with eagerness and made her way downstairs into the Grate Hall. The decorations were like those of last year only there were more black hangings.  
  
Ginny's heart sank. It had been exactly one year since he left. He fought to keep her eyes dry as she walked to her chair. She wanted the ceremony to finish as soon as possible, but the end didn't seem to want to come  
  
It also seemed that Dumbledore deemed appropriate to mention last year's graduation along with the fact that a brave Griffindor gave his life for the wizardry world and how-  
  
Ginny turned her attention somewhere else, trying to block out the headmaster's voice and the memories that were coming back to haunt her but it was too late. She already had silent tears streaming down her face. Some of her fellow students gave her saddened looks as some cried along with her.  
  
Dumbledore's speech ended and all the students rose in unison to exit the Grate Hall or find their parents  
  
Ginny stood up looking lost as Dumbledore made his way towards her and she noticed that although he was smiling, the twinkle in his eyes was gone.  
  
Her heart fell. It never occurred to her but now it hit her; he was in grief. He had lost Harry as well, and Harry was like a grandson to him and must miss him a lot  
  
"Miss Weasley" he said slowly as he approached her, "could I have a word with you please? In my office if you may"  
  
Ginny nodded slightly in surprise and followed him towards his office. The walk there was quiet. When they reached the office there was someone already there. Someone very familiar. It was -  
  
A/N so? What do you think of this chappie? I know this one was abit rushed but there was nothing going on in Ginny's life so I had to. Btw who do you think it is? Leave your ideas in a review ;p. I hope you enjoyed it. I wish you all a happy new year and I hope you had a magical Christmas xXx 


	11. Goodbyes

Declaimer: Although I haven't updated this story for a while (so sorry) I assure you nothing has changed and I still don't own anything (*sigh*). Anywayz I hope you enjoy this chapter 'coz it's the last chapter for this story. There might be a sequel if you people want one but first you are going to have to read it and you ain't doing that till I shut up right? But first…

Many thanks to my reviewers:

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Angelface58 ~I actually didn't say that he was dead did I? I only said he was gone, but oh, well, we'll see.. Hope you like this heh

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BuckNC ~ Thanks. The end actually depends on the amount of people that want the story to finish here or if they want a sequel heh

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Child-of-the-Dawn ~ You are absolutely right. You are one of the two people that don't think its Harry heh. Enjoy!

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Dk Lili ~ Nope, not Harry but hope you like the outcome anyway

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Fairy Dust ~ Thanks, enjoy!

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Griffindor lady ~ Thanks, sorry for the late update, hope you enjoy it

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Hedwig55 ~Nope, not Harry but hope you enjoy the chapter anyway

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Infinite Moment ~ Thanks. It will hopefully get less sad in the sequel (if I haven one)

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Katie John ~ Thank you so much for your kind words. I got your e-mail as I was going to update this very chapter and I had to put you in here. Your e-mail has got me smiling for (I predict) all week. I'm very sorry I haven't updated for so long. I've started reading James + Lily stories and I cant seem to get enough of them. Plus the bloody teachers that rule our "school" seem to forget that we have external exams in a month and so pile our work load with homework, projects, tests along with the coursework that we are suppose to be doing and so I cant seem to find the time to update as frequently as I would like. This is actually my very first fic and I'm happy to see the response I'm receiving. There is a plot attached to all this but this is actually the first part only, there's a sequel all planned out and I only needed to see how many would like the prequel of it so that I continue it. Again thank you so much. I'm actually going to dedicate this chapter to you and one of my other favourate reviewers **VastityCheerleader**. And I would like to give you the same preposition I gave to her. Would you like to be my beta reader? Due to the school period I understand there won't be enough time to check it thoroughly so I would like two to be sure. What do you say? Let me know in a review or e-mail

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LAoR (Lady Arwen of Rivendell) ~ Thank you so much! I know what you mean about the guy thing as well but oh well. I hope this ok for you, and sorry for the late update

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Lady Fae ~ Sorry babe, not Harry, hope you like it anyway

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Lady Macbeth10 ~ *rubs ears* sorry not him, but I hope you enjoy it all the same though

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Pumpkinpiebaby ~ Thank you so much, I feel so loved. About the cliffy, I had no other place where I could have stopped the chapter heh. Enjoy!

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Rayssa Radcliffe ~ Thanks. I haven't found time to check your stories yet, but rest assured, that I will

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Rhiain ~ Thank you, hope you enjoy the ending

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Sherryn ~ Nope not Harry's ghost either, enjoy the chapter anyway

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Siriusremusjames ~ Its not Harry, you're right. The second to do so! Heh. Not Remus either but I hope you wont get angry at who it actually is. Enjoy

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VastityCheerleader ~ thank you so much! I really love it when you review my stories as you were with me from the beginning. I really feel so loved. You are one of my most faithful reviewer of all and I would like to give you a preposition to repay you for your loyalty: would you like to be my beta reader for the sequel? (if I have one that is, I'll get back to you on that ) I asked another reviewer to do it as well as I know the stress in school and I believe that it would be easier if I have two beta readers. That is if you accept. What do you say? By the way this chapter is dedicated to you and **Katie John**, who is the other reviewer that I've mentioned before. You could give me your answer through a review or e-mail if you want. Enjoy!

And anyone that reviewed

Now on with the story…

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Chapter 11: Goodbyes

"Ron", Ginny exclaimed, "What on earth are you doing here?"

"What, no hello dear favourate brother of mine?" Ron smiled at her

"Hello, dear brother of mine", she smiled back, "now what are you doing here?" she added in a much more demanding tone

"Well, I actually came to watch your graduation as mum, dad and everyone else had to do some important business or something, and Professor Dumbledore called me here to tell me something" he replied. He then turned o Professor Dumbledore and added, "So sir, what did you want to discuss with me?"

"The matter, which I want to discuss mister Weasley, concerns both you and your sister" he answered as he made his way to his desk. "I did wish to involve Miss Granger in this particular discourse as I foresee the outcome already, but alas a great mind never ceases searching for more information" he smiled fondly

"Please take a seat" he said a few seconds later, "and I'll explain everything"

Ginny felt the blood in her body freeze and her heart began beating faster and faster, and she began wondering if Ron or Professor Dumbledore could hear it banging against her rib cage.

She wanted to leave

NOW!

Neither of them made a move as they waited for the headmaster to continue. Both her and Ron knew what was coming. Their suspicions were proven as Dumbledore spoke again.

"As you wish," he and took a deep breath. 

"As you know, Harry has left us," he said solemnly. Ginny felt her legs give away as she sank into the chair opposite from Dumbledore, as her blood unfroze and rushed to her head. She indistinctly heard Ron draw in a sharp breath. "He went missing the day Lord Voldemort died; at least his body is missing but many witnesses saw a very great bright light that night, in area which Voldemort was reported to be

"The Avada Kadavra curse gives out a certain amount of light, depending on the power of the person who conjured it. Neither Voldemort nor Harry was that powerful to conjure that much and due to the amount of the light that was seen. It can easily be presumed that two identical curses were fired at the same time thus causing the force to become more than ten times deadlier as it may increase the body temperature and burn a person alive, " he paused to let this information to sink into their minds before continuing.

"But-" he began, only to be interrupted by Ginny

"NO!" she exclaimed.

Ron looked at his little sister in surprise while Dumbledore looked as if he was expecting this reaction 

"Harry is not dead," she stated, trembling slightly. "Yes, he might have gone missing that night but that doesn't mean he's dead. He's not!" she repeated silently

Her blood was boiling; didn't Dumbledore trust Harry enough to believe he's not dead?

"Miss Weasley- Ginny, please sit down" he said calmly. Ginny, didn't realize she had gotten to her feet, sank back into her chair, still boiling.

"There's something you should know" Dumbledore told her. He glanced at Ron, who had a begging expression on his face, as if he didn't want Dumbledore to continue. Ginny looked at him with an expression mixed with expectancy and fear

"Harry did not leave the day you last saw him," he said. Ron brought his hands up and buried his head in them, while Ginny's eyes shot out

"What do you mean, he didn't leave that day?" she asked after a few long seconds.

"Harry, came to me, a year ago today, asking to find the whereabouts of Voldemort. He wanted to reach him as soon as possible so he would be able to return to you, Ginny", he paused before continuing again, "he did love you Ginny. More than you will know. He loved all of you. But he knew he had to go through with it and he knew it would be hard. He gave his life for all of us. He saved us-" he was once more cut off by Ginny

"He gave his life for us. That's the whole point. He was useful to you because of that, wasn't he? Everyone expected him to save us a second time around. Well he did! Are you all happy now? He wasn't even ready to go out there. He was only eighteen!" she shouted in outrage.

"Ginny I know how you feel. I do agr-" he began but he didn't manage to complete his thought

"You do **_NOT_** know how I feel! No one does. How could you?" she bellowed

"Ginny calm down" Ron spoke for the first time, trying to reason with her

"Ron, how can you just sit there like that and act like you-" she went silent as realization dawned on her. "You knew!" she exclaimed. "You knew he was here. Ron how could you not tell me!"

"I just wanted you to be safe, Ginny. I knew you would want to see him, but it was easier to just let him leave" he ended silently

"Ginny, it was his destiny. But now he's gone. We all have to try to accept it. His bravery will never be matched and he will always live in our hearts. He was a great man, Ginny. Though he is gone, he is never forgotten" Dumbledore voiced

"NO! He is NOT dead!" she cried, tears escaping her eyes

"Ginny, you have to accept the fact that he's gone" Ron breathed, tears forming in his own eyes

"No! There's nothing to accept because he's not gone!" she shrieked. 

She was going crazy. She needed to get out of there. NOW!

She headed towards the door

"Ginny, there is something you should know about the prophecy" Dumbledore spoke to her back. Ginny ignored his pleading tone and didn't turn around

"No. I'm leaving. I've had enough. I don't want to know anything" she replied coldly. With her hand on the doorknob she turned around one last time before she went through

"He will some back. You'll see. He'll come back" she mumbled and left, leaving Ron to feel apprehensive and Dumbledore t feel drained and exhausted.

After a few minutes of deafening silence, Ron got up to find his sister without uttering a single word to the headmaster

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Ginny stormed out of Dumbledore's office, tears streaking down her face, blood boiling and heart pounding

When she was a safe distance away from Dumbledore's office she collapsed against a wall panting hard. A few seconds later, she regained some control over her breathing as well as her mind. Stood up and ran back to Gryffindor Tower.

She knew Dumbledore was right but she didn't want to accept it. Maybe Dumbledore did know how she felt but not entirely.

He didn't know it felt to give yourself to the person you loved. He didn't know how it felt when you woke up the next day to find out that he's gone to save the world and doesn't come back but you keep having reminders thrown to her face. 

And her dreams didn't help either. She kept having dreams of Harry saying goodbye that were then filled with green light.

She needed to leave. To go somewhere and start over

Just as she had planned. By the end of the night, she would be in New York.

As she stepped into the Gryffindor common room she was instantly reminded of Harry's departure. This is where it all began. 

She stretched out her wand

"Accio trunk" she ordered

A few seconds later her trunk came flying down the stairs and hovered in the air beside her. She looked around her one last time, taking in her surroundings. She was leaving.

She was really leaving.

She had to

She needed to start over. To find herself again, without Harry.

She walked to the fireplace and dug her hand in her pocked, withdrawing it with floo powder. She was about to throw it in the fire when the portrait hole opened revealing a very exasperated Ron.

"Ginny!" he exclaimed, "what are you doing?" he asked stopping in his tracks

"I'm leaving," she said simply

"Wa- Why? Is this because of Harry?" he asked

"Yes.. No.. Partly. Ron I need time to find myself again" she replied, lowering her hand from the fire

"But Ginny-" he began

"No, Ron. You don't understand. This year I've lost myself and I need time to be found," she breathed. Ron took in a deep breath, defeated

"Where are you going to go?" he asked finally 

"I can't tell you. But I'll owl you when I get there. I promise" she told him

"Is there anything I can do to make you stay? For a while?" he pleaded

"Ron, no. I've made my decision. Please don't make it any harder than what it already is. I'm leaving," she said in a low whisper

"Ok," he whispered back. "So I guess this is goodbye?" he added after a few moments of silence, in which they both tried to settle their eyes on anything but each other.

At his words, Ginny's eyes snapped at him. She rushed to embrace him, with tears in her eyes

"This is most definitely _not_ goodbye," she whispered in his ear between sobs. "This is see you soon," she added as she stepped back

"Ron don't tell anyone that you saw me leaving ok? Tell them that you didn't find me,"

she told him

"But Gin-"

"Ron, please. Promise me," she begged. Ron hesitated

"I promise. Take care of yourself ok? If ever you need any-" he started

"Ron, I will take care of myself. I will contact you if I need anything. I will send owls every so often. I will, Ron, but I have to leave to do so," she said exasperatedly, albeit with a small smile playing on her lips

"Ok, ok, I get it. We love you Gin and we'll be waiting for you to come back," he said sentimentally.

Ginny hugged him one last time and stepped to the fireplace once again. Still holding the floo powder in one hand, she dug her other hand in her other pocket and pulled out something glittery, leaving it to drop to the floor before stepping into the fire.

Ron was left behind to pick up a golden necklace. It was a small emerald fairy tied to a golden chain. As Ron studied it, his eyes wandered to the fireplace, where Ginny was a few seconds ago

She was gone now.

Ron didn't know how long he had been there, studying that small necklace, watching the fir die out, but he later left casting one last look on the now empty common room

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THE END

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A/N how's that for an ending? You like? Now if you want a sequel all you have to do is say so in a review heh. Go on, it wont kill you.. I hope (jk)


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